Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas. -Johnny Carson Christmas
I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself. -Johnny Carson Food
I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself. -Johnny Carson Health
Never continue in a job you don't enjoy. If you're happy in what you're doing, you'll like yourself, you'll have inner peace. And if you have that, along with physical health, you will have had more success than you could possibly have imagined. -Johnny Carson Peace
Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill. -Johnny Carson Happiness
For days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow, but phone calls taper off. -Johnny Carson Death
Never continue in a job you don't enjoy. If you're happy in what you're doing, you'll like yourself, you'll have inner peace. And if you have that, along with physical health, you will have had more success than you could possibly have imagined. -Johnny Carson Work
Married men live longer than single men. But married men are a lot more willing to die. -Johnny Carson Marriage
Never continue in a job you don't enjoy. If you're happy in what you're doing, you'll like yourself, you'll have inner peace. And if you have that, along with physical health, you will have had more success than you could possibly have imagined. -Johnny Carson Success
If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners. -Johnny Carson Funny
Talent alone won't make you a success. Neither will being in the right place at the right time, unless you are ready. The most important question is: 'Are your ready?' -Johnny Carson Success
Never continue in a job you don't enjoy. If you're happy in what you're doing, you'll like yourself, you'll have inner peace. And if you have that, along with physical health, you will have had more success than you could possibly have imagined. -Johnny Carson Health
