I'm thankful for the three ounce Ziploc bag, so that I have somewhere to put my savings. - Paula Poundstone 1 Share Now -
I don't have a bank account because I don't know my mother's maiden name. - Paula Poundstone 2 Share Now -
Once I was gone for a month and I was just miserable, so I flew back from Florida for two hours just to be home and see my cats. - Paula Poundstone 3 Share Now -
I used to watch 'The Waltons' and sob because my family was nothing like that. We had a cruel sense of humor in my family. - Paula Poundstone 4 Share Now -
My Mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out in the lake and threw her off the boat. I said, 'Mom, they weren't trying to teach you how to swim.' - Paula Poundstone 5 Share Now -
I don't need a holiday or a feast to feel grateful for my children, the sun, the moon, the roof over my head, music, and laughter, but I like to take this time to take the path of thanks less traveled. - Paula Poundstone 6 Share Now -
I'm thankful for the three ounce Ziploc bag, so that I have somewhere to put my savings. - Paula Poundstone 8 Share Now -
I have a very silly sense of humor. I've never laughed harder in my entire life than seeing someone with toilet paper stuck on the bottom of their shoe. - Paula Poundstone 9 Share Now -
The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling. - Paula Poundstone 10 Share Now -