If it's true that our species is alone in the universe, then I'd have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little. - George Carlin 1 Share Now -
There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past. - George Carlin 3 Share Now -
Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they? - George Carlin 7 Share Now -
Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not? Some people have to go to work and don't have time for all that. - George Carlin 8 Share Now -
Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck. - George Carlin 9 Share Now -
Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit. - George Carlin 10 Share Now -
