I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it's the government. -Woody Allen Government
Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon. -Woody Allen Life
If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank. -Woody Allen God
I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers. -Woody Allen Education
Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good. -Woody Allen Good
Right now it's only a notion, but I think I can get the money to make it into a concept, and later turn it into an idea. -Woody Allen Money
Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage. -Woody Allen Food
I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying. -Woody Allen Death